Twentysomethings

Yesterday afternoon, I attended a session on “Conquering the Quarter-Life Crisis: Helping the Next Generation Fall in Love and Stay in Love with Jesus.” The presenters were two twenty-something young women who were very passionate about Jesus and the need for the church to reach out to young people.

Margaret Feinberg shared what she had discovered while writing a book called (appropriately enough) “Twentysomethings.” She pointed out that Twentysomethings are experiencing some major demographic shifts that have not only a great impact on their lives but also on their culture.

1. They are getting married later. Since 1970, the average age of marriage has shifted from 20-24 for women and from 22-27 for men. Young people are leaving college and entering the work force in great debt and without partners.

(On a side note—she pointed out the changes in the size of the average new home and the impact larger homes have on our culture. For instance, if you have four people living in a 1400 square foot home, you are constantly bumping into each other—essentially forced to spend time together. In a 3000 square foot house, everyone has their separate spaces. And then, of course, there is the much higher debt associated with the larger home! Makes you wonder about the impact of larger homes on our entire culture.)

2. They are in greater debt. The average college graduate leaves school owing $18,000 in student loans and $4000 in credit card debt. Imagine being 21 and starting your career owing $22,000 right off the bat!

3. They are on the move. 45% of Americans between the ages of 24 and 35 plan to move in the next two years. And the median stay in a job is 1.3 years!

4. And they are lonely and looking for authentic relationships. While they seem busy, they are searching for real relationships—not just romantic—but friendship and support from people who genuinely care.

All this leads to a couple of observations from her:

• Ministry with 20somethings requires a tender heart. Because they are highly mobile they are only there for a season, but they need our love and support for the time they are with us.


• Ministry with 20somethings requires a team approach. The more relationships the better and they truly are looking for more experienced adults to mentor them—but they are a bit afraid of us so we have to reach out to them.


• You can’t simply build it for them and expect them to come. We have to build relationships perhaps as slowly as one person at a time.


• Ministry with 20somethings should be judged not by how many people but by how deep the relationships go!

Finally -- The way to a 20something's heart

FOOD--and free food is even better. Those between 24 and 35 only average 5 homecooked meals a week (hey that sounds better than at my house!). And the addition of something as simple as chips and coke transforms a Bible study into a party.

Media--Use media well and appropriately (they aren't impressed with using just because you can) to touch their hearts.

TIME -- and the most important times are 1) when they first visit, 2) birthdays, and 3) when they leave.